pay this man, killl your brand!
Blue Marlin clothing now has a few hundred grand less in their bank account these days.
That's cuz they gave it to K-Fed.
Virgin Mobile has $25,000 less than they did BEFORE they paid K-Fed to appear at one of their campaigns.
And if you want K-Fed to come speak at your graduation, or wedding, or funeral, or baptism, or ordination, or bachelorette party: it's gonna cost ya $20k. Cuz that's just how he rolls.
He's hot.
Like fire.
So, time for a little role playing. If I were the CFO of a major brand name and I needed a body to stick in an outfit to toss up on a billboard and I planned to pay a quarter million dollars for that body, would that body belong to Mr Kevin Federline?
Thinking.....thinking.....(isn't he the one with the sort of famous wife?).....thinking....(he's sort of tall...)...hmmmmmm....thinking...(he's a dad....dads need to wear clothes, right? yeah, dads wear clothes)...uhhhh.....thinking.....(what about those Carter boys? are they still young and delicious???)....thinking.....ahhhh.....hmmmm....(and that Kathy Griffin chick....she's all over the place these days)....thinking....K-Fed....thinking
NO!!!!!!!
No, I would not allow two hundred and fifty THOUSAND DOLLARS of my company's money to slide into the ever-Lamborghini-lovin palms of Mr Kevin Federline.
If I were a marketing drone for a company as high-profile as Virgin Mobile, would I dare suggest we add him to the paid guest list at our next penny campaign? No, because I like my pretty little head firmly attached to my lovely little neck, and I would expect - had they a shred of decency - that the higher powers at Virgin Mobile would promptly slice my head off between sips of coffee if I suggested K-Fed would be a reasonable addition to our paid guest list.
At any rate, good for the boy for bringing home some cash. The dlisted bit says he's got a line of "beach jewelry" in the works? As an accessory FIEND, I'm still having trouble envisioning exactly what BEACH jewelry would be.
And, because you know you love looking at him, too, here he is again, striking a haht pose:
posted by heatheradair at 10:56 PM
14 Comments:
I wonder if HE uses shampoo?
I don't know why people give the guy so much flack. He's ugly, stupid, and uncouth, yet somehow, he finagled his way into Britney Spears' pants and bank account. He's livin' the dream man...livin' the dream.
Ick. He's so WT it hurts.
he's sort of a man's Paris Hilton...wealthy by lucky association, pops up at parties, in newspapers and magazines, is famous for his $$$ windfall if nothing else, and he's an easy target.
He's a new-money heir...
he's also ridiculously tacky, and yes: VERY very lucky.
You know, I think you underestimate the subtle genius that is K-Fed. I think he WANTS people to rabidly hate him, because it gets him press.
Paris Hilton is very smart too. I was thinking the other day about what a major icon of this decade Paris Hilton is when you go past her individual celebrity and look at her overall influence: people want pampered rich kids 24/7 now! The OC, Laguna Beach, The Hills, My Super Sweet 16, Rich Girls, Simple Life, Survival of the Richest, the documentary "Born Rich", she's basically the founder of a major trend.
I dislike Federline, but I also find him interesting. He probably generates more buzz than Britney by this point!
Is it subtle genius? That would suggest a measure of forethought on K-Fed's part that I'm not certain exists...is there power in the Paris Hilton celebrity brand: without qualification, yep - but maybe I'm just out of touch with all of these companies' targeted demographic if I'm supposed to be impressed, and in turn put down hard-earned cash for their product because I saw this guy associated with it...
I can recognize that white trash hangers-on and spoiled, pampered kids with huge senses of entitlement are great fuel for the gossip machine, but to hedge your quarter million dollar marketing bet on it...maybe you're right, maybe it is a calculated gamble that will absolutely pay off, it might be genius cash in on the fact that we love to hate 'em, but I guess I gotta face it, K-Fedder's a household name...(whaddaya think, should I invite him to come dj my wedding?)
I would, personally, have a little trouble buying a t-shirt pimped by him, but since the ultimate point is to generate conversation about their brand, get a little curiosity going, see where it leads, I guess it's not completely misguided...
guess it works to some degree - I wrote about him, didn't i? ;)
As for Paris...
well, I don't change the station when her song comes on, that's cause for a SERIOUS existential crisis...
3:46 PM
guess it works to some degree - I wrote about him, didn't i? ;)
Not just that but you mentioned Virgin Mobile and Blue Marlin, the latter being a brand I never even heard of until this point. If Federline wasn't endorsing it but rather a more conventional celebrity like Tiger Woods, would you have mentioned it? No, because it's just another normal, sensible endorsement, dog bites man. And I would never have learned the company name as a result. When Blue Marlin hires Kevin Federline, people think "what company would hire THAT idiot?" Hiring K-Fed is a man-bites-dog move. It's the same reason Kate Moss's endorsements went up instead of down after she got caught cokeslutting, because companies know people are going to be watching to see who will still pay for her endorsement.
A lot of companies believe that brand awareness is the most important thing, although I think the reason WHY people are aware of your brand is just as important. Hiring K-Fed may make more people aware of Blue Marlin than a more conventional choice, but I agree with you that it's debatable whether that's a good association or not.
K-Fed gets more attention than Britney merely b/c he's out n about while Britney stays in, all preggers. Britney can take back the spotlight whenever she wants - all she has to do is drop a little baby.
T - I think I actually do ascribe to the theory that any attention is good attention...this sort of pushes the limits of my theory, however...interesting thing: when I visited the Blue Marlin website, they actually managed to make the Fed look...passable. Or not quite recognizeable as himself. Not quite the face of a sportswear line that I'd personally expect to sell clothes, but they made him sort of shadowy, in the spirit of, "hey, that kind of looks like....naw, couldn't be him."
VJD - wouldn't it be interesting if that didn't turn out to be true? If, by some stroke of pop-culture lightning, HIS career takes off and she's stalled out...she'll be known as "Kevin Federline's wife" instead of the other way around. That would be a cruel twist of fate :) She can't sell out a county fair and he's rockin Wango Tango...
he makes me want to projectile vomit
z, the way he rocks the socks and flip-flops thing...i have to agree. projectile. vomiting.
Federline Yo! I loved that SNL skit...
~G
I used to work with a guy that wore socks and flip flops. We called people like that nerds.
"If, by some stroke of pop-culture lightning, HIS career takes off and she's stalled out..." I can almost see that happening. We love to build people up just to tear them down, but with K-Fed, all the tearing might accidentally build him up. You guys might be on to something comparing him to Paris and Kate Moss. I propose we call it the "Hilton Hypothesis"
The Hilton Hypothesis states that the more controversy and ridicule surrounding any pop-culture personality, the more the public wants to see of/hear from/read about them, propelling the personality up the ranks of popularity.
Super color scheme, I like it! Keep up the good work. Thanks for sharing this wonderful site with us.
»
Post a Comment
<< Home